I can't go back to sleep, so I thought I'd type out what's been mulling around in my head as I lay in bed :). We have a doctor's appointment next Friday, April 24th, one at 8am and one at 9am. It's really incredible the amount of peace that Stan and I have felt the last couple of months. I can't explain it, and I guess that's how it's supposed to be, right? :) "A peace that surpasses all understanding..."
During these months we've been given to pray and believe for Anniston's healing, I have searched Scripture more for examples of healing, and God has brought to my attention some extremely encouraging stories of healing while bringing to light more about HIS DESIRE to heal.
Yes, there were times when Jesus chose specific individuals in a crowd to heal (and I think that's awesome and shows just how personal He is!), but, correct me if I'm wrong, I have not found a verse where someone comes to Him asking for healing where He does not heal. How amazing! I just keep finding verses like this: "Now when the sun was setting, ALL those who had ANY who were sick with various diseases brought them to Him, and He laid his hands on EVERY ONE of them and healed them." (Luke 4:40) Doesn't it seem like this is what God desires for us? I cannot imagine any of these people standing in line, waiting to be healed, wondering if God was really going to heal their sick. They just knew. They saw Him heal others, and their faith was strengthened to the point that they did not doubt. WOW. Then, I read in Acts about the apostles, and a similar verse to the one in Luke says that those who brought their sick were "ALL healed" (Acts 5:16). It sounds like we just need to come to Him and believe without doubting...easier said than done, I know.
Jesus even said: "Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do, and greater works than these will he do, because I am going to the Father. Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me ANYTHING in my name, I WILL do it." (John 14:12-14). WOW again!! I think it's of the most importance to note the end of this verse that says "that the Father may be glorified in the Son." That is what it's all about: bringing Him glory. When people were healed in these stories we read in the Bible, MANY believed, and that point is almost always made when a healing takes place. Yes, God cares about us and that we are in pain here on earth, but His main concern is that others know Him and that He is glorified. I pray that God is glorified in our situation.
Stan and I were driving back from Louisiana a couple of weeks ago, and I just started pouring my heart out to him. He is so wise. I was just telling him about how I'm trying to have that kind of faith that doesn't doubt that God can and has healed Anniston, but it is sometimes hard to keep that faith up when I talk to other people. It honestly makes me cringe when I'm asked about the surgery the doctors predicted or about going to Pennsylvania. Don't get me wrong, I would have probably asked the same questions before going through this myself, but it's just hard when I'm trying to have faith and not doubt. We have had countless people encouraging us and believing for healing (and, you really don't know how grateful we are for you!), but it's amazing how one little question or statement can set me back. It shouldn't though, right? Isn't that exactly what the Devil wants? I have never understood this phrase more than I do now: "Fight of Faith". SO true.
I LOVE doctors, and I am SOOO thankful for them because without them, we would not have known about Anniston's heart, but their report is not above the Lord's report, and their name or the name of the ailment they've given us is not above the name of Jesus. That day, Stan brought up the fact that years ago, when people needed to be healed, believers just gathered together and went straight to God because they HAD to. How sad that we don't always feel like we have to anymore....just a thought to ponder...
I must have had a lot on my mind because I have written a novel! Thank you for letting me vent :).